As seen in: Bucky O'Hare (NES)
Distinguishing feature: He's a green rabbit in a bright red uniform.
Strengths: Charisma, jumping.
Weaknesses: Had a lame cartoon show based on a comic from the ‘70s.
Profile by Tomm Hulett | December 24, 2009
Bucky O’Hare? Now there’s a name I haven’t heard in years. No, no, I knew him. Probably as well as any of us did, back then. We fought in the Toad Wars together, though honestly he did all the fighting. I was in the background, fixing the ship, building photon accelerators, patching up damaged climate satellites. I swear we must’ve circled the Aniverse ten times over in those days. All to defend the UAF from the Toad Empire. It never sat right with Bucky -- what happened to the Toads after. It wasn’t their fault, you know? They were all hypnotized by KOMPLEX and who were we to... well, oh... oh, you didn’t come here to hear about that.
It was shortly after we liberated Warren, Bucky’s home planet. He’d gotten morose in those days, probably because of the things he’d seen down there. What the Toads did to his home. I wasn’t a smiling peach myself, after my parents turned off the accelerator I’d built back on Earth and trapped me in the Aniverse forever. It was another cold, lonely night onboard the Righteous Indignation at the end of a long string of such nights. I’d hidden myself in the engine room, where I went when I needed a good cry... you wanted honesty, didn’t you? I was thinking of my Susie back home. Why, I was too young to even know what to do with a girl back then, and there I was, never going to see another one as long as I lived. No other humans out here.
Uh... So there’s this bright light, an explosion, and then the Toads show up. They grabbed us all. All of us except Bucky, of course. Where was the rest of S.P.A.C.E.? Where was Commander Dogstar and the Indefatigable? Couldn’t tell you. But what would the Toads want with them, anyway? By then things were personal. KOMPLEX wanted Bucky bad, and that computer program would use us to get him. We were each taken to a planet. We knew Bucky would come, though. Even though it was all just a trap, nobody doubted Bucky would save the day.
Naturally, he saved me last. Not that I blame him. Some little kid that cribbed O’Hare’s moves while following in his shadow? No, the rest of the crew... each one of them had a unique ability Bucky could employ after saving them. Our Android First-Class Blinky could fire bullets that destroyed ice. Jenny, Bucky’s lady fair and our resident psychic, could summon little round energy dealies. Most impressive of all was our gunner, Deadeye Duck. He had four arms, you see. No wings, but four arms. He’d use ‘em to climb walls. Big fan of Contra too, so he carried one a’ those... you know, spread guns. Me? Well yeah, sitting in my cell on the Yellow Planet I came to grips with my plight and started inventing again to chase the blues away. I was proud of myself too, until Bucky arrived with everyone and their cool powers. Felt kind of silly, sitting there pretending to flaunt my shiny new laser gun. As if everyone didn’t already have a laser gun of their own. Its beams went through walls, though. That was kind of cool.
Victory was short-lived, and the Toads sprung their trap. They captured us inside their Magma Tanker and I spent a few more hours in a cell. Of course, Bucky showed up shortly afterward, none the worse for wear, and even seeming like his old self again. Didn’t take too much effort after that to defeat the Toads and foil KOMPLEX’s plan. Still not sure how Bucky did it, though. Even though he was the most versatile of us all -- able to fire his gun both up and down, not to mention jump really really high -- his head was just so large onscreen. It constantly seemed to collide with instant-kill spikes. Oh well, not important.
A few campaigns later and the war ended. Everyone went back to their home planets to live regular lives, save for a handful of us. I obviously had no way back to San Francisco... Bucky was a good friend for a while. He tried to mentor me, assure me life would be better here in the Aniverse. But I was growing up, and Bucky had been at this for a long time. He eventually went back to Warren to start a family, and he took Jenny along. I don’t blame her for going. Don’t think any of us could, really. Without Bucky her career options weren’t exactly plentiful. It was pretty much birth his flop-eared children or, what? Let the Furries exploit her? Bucky never would have allowed that to happen.
I saw him occasionally after that. Seemed to take to family life well. Really loved his kids. But we lost touch, and... well, I didn’t go to the funeral. Couldn’t bring myself to see everyone. Not even sure why, I think I’m just getting old. After a point, you convince yourself the past is better left in the past. Sorry, Buck. A big green space rabbit probably deserved better from his friends. You’re sorely missed.
-- William H. DuWitt, Engineer, retired
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