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• Last Update: June 02, 2012, at 09:53 AM
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'Sup, my daring dudes and dudettes? It is I, the Great Sukiyaki, self-proclaimed King of all Mystics! It’s probably been ages since you last studied the sage-like teachings I first shared in the Legend of the Mystical Ninja instruction manual, so just hang tight as I regale you once again with the tale of two bitchin’ bros known as Goemon and Ebisumaru—er, Kid Ying and Dr. Yang. Whatever.

I remember it like it was yesterday, when these bumbling burnouts made their first treacherous trek stateside all the way from the curse-stricken land of Horo-Horo. Bummer, right? Ever since the evil Otafu Army absconded with Princess Yuki, the countryside has fallen on some mad-hard times. The once-chill citizens now assail innocent passersby thanks to a gnarly hex concocted by the Dragon Beast’s right-hand man, the Silver Serpent. What’s worse, righteous King Ryuku is being held hostage in his castle that’s recently been converted into a flying fortress. Looks like Kid Ying and Dr. Yang have got their work, like, totally cut out for them.

Fortunately, the game gurus at Konami have made this awesome adventure more manageable as one of the SNES’ sweetest co-op experiences. Team up with a tomodachi and leap into ninja action through ten levels of platforming paradise! As the duo journeys across Japan, they must visit a variety of villages in search of clues to help them track down the band of brigands. Along the way, they can cash in their coinage to gain access to secret Judo jutsus at the dojo. Once the guys get low on life, have them dip on down to Char Cheddar’s Sushi Joint for takeout tekka-maki. And after all that butt-kicking gets played-out, Kid Ying and Dr. Yang can make time for mini-games of all shapes and sizes: Whack-a-Mole, horse racing, trivia, and even a little Gradius if they have the right hook-ups.

Don’t think all this fun and games is just... fun and games, though. Our heroes will just be waiting to get wiped out if they forget to deck themselves with some hecka tight armor from Yo Hamma-San’s General Store before heading back out to those wild Warlock Zones. For sure, bro! Kid Ying and Dr. Yang are up against some serious odd-skis! Each of these levels is brimming with a bevy of baddies who really know how to kick things into high gear. The boys will have to keep both eyes peeled for Dead Pond Scrolls to rejuvenate their jutstus and the occasional maneki-neko figurine to upgrade their weapons if they want to stand a chance against each area’s head honcho.

You heard me -- consider these boss battles a warm-up, ’cuz you’ll be tangling with these toughs soon enough. That’s right, a legit 16-bit era boss rush! If you don’t flex all your ninja might, you’ll be peeping plenty of Game Over screens, my friend. Fortunately for all you poseurs out there, each of the game’s levels can be revisited thanks to Mystical Ninja’s, um, ancient password system. And just in case you doubt the teachings of the Great Sukiyaki, pop this bad boy in some time:

8#4V7 LprBy 4v52B j@7-T YM?0P 7/4By ;

Ossu! The Great Sukiyaki has, like, spoken.