First appearance: I Want to be the Guy (Kayin, WIN, 2007)
M.O.: Throwing every nasty video game trick in the book right in your weakling face
Weakness: Recursions

Profile by Sean Gandert? | March 29, 2011

You think you know video games, but you donít know video games like The Guy does. Because you may be able to kick ass at Tetris and Super Mario Bros., but how are you at Metroid and Street Fighter? Or Castlevania and Mike Tysonís Punch-Out!!? Because The Guy knows all of them and more like the back of his hand and even if youíre the type of gamer who beats levels of Mega Man without opening your eyes he likely has a surprise for you. Ultimately, whoever you are, when it comes to sheer gaming ability The Guy has you beat.

Thatís also his weakness, though, as well as his strength. The Guyís creativity only extends to video games heís played before and thatís about it. A lifetime of gaming without leaving the house has left him with all sorts of creative ideas about how to protect his valuables and arm his castle, but itís ultimately nothing you havenít seen before. Sure, youíve never seen a Kraidgief before, but youíve seen its component parts and once you get over the parlor trick of combining the two itís no big thing to take him down. Cherries falling up is a big thing the first time you see it, but itís still just cherries falling -- The Guy can twist what heís seen before, but heís only repurposing material, not creating it anew.

Thatís not to say that his castle is impregnable, because it isnít. But thereís a very sad cost to living in such a place, and that cost is loneliness. Thereís a reason The Guy can barely recognize his own son, and itís that becoming The Guy, learning all the many tricks of the trade and spending the countless hours honing his reflexes to get there, meant cloistering himself in a world of video games and nothing else. No family, no friends, just portraits of defeated bosses resting in empty hallways. And sure, the spikes and traps offer some small consolation, but itís only temporary. The Guy must always be defeated in the same patricide his father was, and by surrounding himself by the world of the game he loves he soon begins the cycle again.


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