Games | Weekly Game Releases | Blog | Week of May 13, 2008: Another slow week. But who cares? We know what you're playing. You Elf Bowling fiend, you.

List compiled by reibeatall and Sarcasmorator | Imports by parish, courtesy of NCS | Posted May 12, 2008

Game of the week

The Grace of God | Nothing | More time to play games
Again, nothing really extraordinary comes out this week, so save your money. Unless your fridge is looking a little too empty, in which case you might try a WiiWare title or two.

Also appearing in stores

We Ski
Bandai Namco | Nintendo Wii | Skiing Fun
So you've got your new Wii Balance Board from Wii Fit, and you're already bored with it. What's a good little consumer to do? Why, you could buy a game that utilizes it!

Wait, the Balance Board and Wii Fit aren't out yet? Hmmm. Interesting move, Namco.

Empire Interactive | Nintendo DS | Adventure Game
What better use is there for your DS Lite than playing a crummy port of a confusing 15-year-old point-and-click adventure?! Nothing! It's about time somebody finally heeded my calls of pure confusion and frustration in portable form. And on the DS's tiny screens, pixel-hunting is more exciting than ever!

Drone Tactics
Atlus USA | Nintendo DS | Advance Wars Styled
Ever play Advance Wars and wish you were controlling bugs? Well now you can, with the latest from Atlus, Drone Tactics!

Huh. Are those... crickets I hear? How apropos.

Downloadable Contentment: This Week in DLC

XBLA: Wits and Wagers
Microsoft | Xbox 360 | You got your quiz game in my console
A popular trivia party game in its physical incarnation, the makers of Wits and Wagers' XBLA version doubtlessly hope to kindle the same appeal with this digital doppelganger. The way the game works is that each round every player tries to answer the same question, then each bets on which answer they believe is the correct one. In other words, it's not so much about being right as it is about guessing how stupid the competition is.

Zip | Zilch | Nada
The Virtual Console this week is a black hole from which nothing escapes, especially not Earthbound. Instead, say hello to:

WiiWare: A whole mess of debut games
Various | Wii | Sundry
Nintendo has several games ready to roll out with its new game service it's an analog to the original offerings of XBLA and PSN, which the VC has not been. There are six debut offerings, so we'll hit them up quick.

Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: My Life as a King (Square Enix | Reverse RPG) has the longest title by far, and is probably the most anticipated; you play the guy giving out quests to adventurers instead of being one this time around.

LostWinds (Frontier Developments | Platformer) is one I don't know much about, but I do know you control a little dude, and control the wind in the game with the Wiimote.

Defend Your Castle (XGen Studios | Action) looks sort of like Tower Defense, but with cardboard-cutout/found object graphics and in 2-D, with drop-in multiplayer and unlimited levels.

Pop (Nnooo | Puzzle) is a game where you pop bubbles for points it has an Electroplankton-style minimalist look to it.

TV Show King (Gameloft | Quiz) is a quiz game without a theme.

And V.I.P. Casino: Blackjack (High Voltage Software Inc. | Cards) proves that WiiWare is ready to take on XBLA in the no-stakes downloadable card game department.

Big in Japan: This Week's imports

Luminous Arc 2
Marvelous | DS | RPG
Luminous Arc might actually be the single most generic strategy RPG I've ever played, and damn if that isn't saying something. I'm sure the sequel will be equally bland and predictable! Dear Japan, "secretly evil churches" have not been a surprising or interesting plot element since... oh... 1998. Feel free to join us in the current decade any ol' time, now.

Mahjong Navi DS
NCS | DS | Gamblin'
"Hey! Listen! What would Saria say if she saw you playing that tile?"

Talk about how crappy these games are!